Numbers 9 & 10

9. Try to identify what triggers my meltdowns. Meltdowns, blowups, tantrums or whatever you want to call them are even more horrid for my than they are for you. They occur because one or more of my senses has gone into overload. If you can figure out why me meltdowns occur, they can be prevented. Keep logs noting times, settings, people, activities. A pattern may emerge. Try to remember that all behavior is a form of communication. It tells you, when my words cannot, how I perceive something that is happening in my environment.

Parents, keep is mind as well: persistent behavior may have an underlying medical cause. Food allergies and sensitivities sleep disorders and gastrointestinal problems can all have profound effects on behavior.

If you are a family member, please love me unconditionally. Banish thoughts like, "If he would just…" and "Why can't she…." You did not fulfill every last expectation your parents had for you and you wouldn't like being constantly reminded of it. I did not choose to have autism. But remember that it is happening to me not you. Without your support, my chances of successful, self-reliant adulthood are slim. With your support and guidance, the possibilities are broader than you might think. I promise you --I am worth it.

And finally, three words: Patience. Patience. Patience. Work to view my autism as a different ability rather than a disability. Look past what you may see as limitations and see the gifts autism had given me. It may be true that I'm no good at eye contact or conversation, but have you noticed that I don't lie, cheat at games, tattle on my classmates or pass judgment on the other people? It may also be true that I probably won't be the next Michael Jordan. But with my attention to fine detail and capacity for extraordinary focus. I might be the next Einstein. Or Mozart. Or Van Gogh.

They had autism too.

The answer to Alzheimer's, the enigma of extraterrestrial life--what future achievements from today's children with autism, children like me, lie ahead?

All that I might become won't happen without you as my foundation. Think through some of those societal 'rules', and if they don't make sense for me, let them go. Be my advocate, be my friend, and we'll see just how far I can go.